With the recent (March 2005) discovery of fossilized soft tissue from ''Tyrannosauras Rex'' in Montana (and the possibility that dino DNA might be recovered), a simple solution to the energy crisis presents itself.

* Extract DNA from the soft tissue.  (If none can be recovered, never mind)
* Like in ''Jurassic Park'', clone a herd of T. Rex.  Feed 'em lawyers.  Unlike ''Jurassic Park'', have better security so they don't run amok among the general populace, wrecking things and eating folks (other than lawyers).
* Let them breed until a sizeable population exists.
* Kill 'em off.  Obviously, a meteor strike or super-volcano eruption is impractical and will have side effects, so those techniques are out of the question.  But I'm sure that sufficient ordnance will do the trick.
* Wait 65 million years.
* Fire up the oil well.  Presto, instant (OK, not ''instant'') petroleum!

Once the initial process has started, we can harvest and store dinosaur DNA so the ''next'' time we run out of oil, we don't have to wait for someone to find a well-preserved fossil; we just go to the freezer and get some more.

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Wow, I didn't know President Bush's science advisors knew about wiki!    ;) ;)

''No, this didn't come from Bush's science team.  Bush's science team considers theories about dinosaurs (or anything older than 6000 years ago, when God created the Earth) to be heresy.''


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CategoryWhimsy